Coincidence? Or a sign of destiny?

This morning I experienced a unique vision in my meditation that was followed up by an odd coincidence (I prefer to call it synchronicity). It led me to feel more confident in following my passions. Before I reveal it too soon, let me tell you what happened.

In my meditation this morning, I journeyed to my sacred garden. The same garden that I’ve been visiting since my first Soul Retrieval session. Normally I go into this refreshing creek and let the water carry me to a meadow where I find my spirit animals and such. On a typical journey, I would cross the meadow to enter a cave which houses the four chambers of my soul.

But this time, my higher self had other plans.

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Am I a Starseed?

This may be the point where you stop reading this blog because it’s getting too weird. I warn you, it’s only going to get weirder! Only open minded, curious people are encouraged to read further. :-)

During my Soul Retrieval session a couple weeks ago, my healer recognized in me this deep desire to love, inspire, and uplift people around me. She said I was a Starseed. That was the first I had heard of that term.

I later looked it up and the idea of it is strangely exciting to me. According to Wikipedia, “Starseeds are defined as evolved beings from another planet, star system or galaxy who have come to Earth with the specific mission of assisting its people to achieve a higher level of civilization and peace.” In my own words, I define it as a person who’s soul has a rich galactic lineage and has incarnated in many different forms. Some of those may be of different Extra Terrestrial races. Abilities such as clairvoyance, intuition, empathy, telepathy and the like are common amongst Starseeds.

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Dealing with Negative Emotion – My Experience with Soul Retrieval

A week or two ago I had “Soul Retrieval” session with shamanic healer Kelly La Sha. Kelly is a spiritual teacher that I discovered through the Super Woo Radio podcast by George Kavassilas. If you want to get into some mind-expanding stuff, I would check it out, but keep an open mind and heart.

A Soul Retrieval is a type of meditation that helps you trace back your emotional wounds to their original source so you can heal them. As you know, I’ve been going through depression the past few years and have found various means of coping and dealing with it. After my spiritual awakening last June, I no longer consider myself depressed. But I still suffer from negative emotions that seem to bubble up out of nowhere or I’m easily triggered into some sort of upset reaction.

From Kelly’s website,

Throughout my years of counseling individuals through depression and anxiety, I have found that they consistently stem from a stifled soul. Depression is a direct reflection of a soul not being allowed to fully and freely express its purpose. Stored conscious and unconscious fear is the only thing that keeps us from such freedom of expression. In my private healing sessions, we energetically release your fear which is quite different from a therapy session. Therapy usually remains in the cognitive realm with the approach of thinking your way through healing. Feeling your way through healing is far more effective and significantly faster than cognitive therapies. In addition, my private sessions focus on teaching you how to use the Liquid Mirror tools on your own so that you can practice them on a daily basis to continue your path to wholeness on a daily basis – the true path of Mastery and Self-Sourcing.

In my personal development journey, I’m becoming less afraid of dealing with my negative emotions. In fact, I’m beginning to embrace them. Because they literally are gifts that show you the areas that you can work on.

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Someone to Talk To

A couple weeks ago I was having a really bad night. It’s too personal for me to want to share publicly right now, but I needed someone to talk to. I could have talked to my wife, friends, parents, or even the myriad of followers I have on social media. But I needed someone who didn’t know me to lend an unbiased ear.

Have you ever been in that situation? It seems sometimes we want to talk to a stranger just because they likely won’t judge or make assumptions about us. Or maybe what you want to say is not something you are ready to tell people you know? Some of you reading this that know me are probably making judgements and assumptions about me right now. Deal with it :-)

Sometimes the best advice is actually no advice. Just a listener. I found that’s all I really wanted, someone I could vent with. So I googled “someone to talk to” and found this website 7 Cups of Tea. I was impressed. A website that allows me to connect with a stranger and I can just type at them and they will listen and be supportive of me no matter what I’m going through.

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Breakdancing on a Big Stage

Last night I found myself in this grand spectacle of lights and show biz. I got to breakdance as part of ShowPeace Entertainment at the Dazzle the District event at Playhouse Square. It feels kind of like a dream.

Click here to watch a news story about the event which features a cameo of me and Tony at 1:20! Here’s an animated GIF of the part where we make an appearance.

showpeace entertaiment at Dazzle the District at Playhouse Square in Cleveland

This is a moment that I’m sure I’ll remember for a long time. It’s kind of a dream come true in a weird way. I never imagined being a performer like this on such a big stage. But lately, as I’ve been listening to my heart and allowing my higher self to guide my direction in life, it has pushed me onto the stage.

So here I am!

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Thank You Edinboro

The past couple days have been amazing. I had the pleasure to speak to the senior graphic design class at Edinboro University and jury their show. The talk I gave was a small and intimate one where I told the story of my highest highs and my lowest lows in my career and life. I even managed to throw in some breakdancing and got a few students up on stage to learn some top rock.

And if that wasn’t enough, the students stuck around for some lucid dreaming discussion. I was told that this was a rare thing for students to stick around like this. Normally they would just leave as soon as the lecture is over.

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Let Me Be Your Mentor

Introducing Maker/Mistaker Sessions – Private 1 on 1 personal development coaching by yours truly.

This is something I’ve thought about for awhile now and I’m finally taking action on it. I want to be your mentor, life coach, or personal development consultant. This is almost entirely offline and private, real-life discussions. One hour with love and focus on YOU and your personal development.

I have found myself in many conversations with people about how to overcome anxiety, fear, doubt, and depression. We are all makers and we love to create, but we tend to live our lives filled with discontent and unease. Why is that? I personally felt like I was living the dream, yet I was getting more and more depressed. My emotions were constantly riding the wave of what others thought of me, or how much money we made.

I want to help you get through your biggest fears and worries. I want to help you identify your true purpose in life and hold you accountable to live it. I want to help you improve your relationships at home and at work. I love to break the surface of everyday discussion and get to the root of why we are stuck, unhappy, confused, tired, and burnt out. I love the intimate conversations and breakthroughs that result.

If you’re interested in a session, give me a shout and we can talk pricing and availability. If you can’t meet me in person anywhere near Cleveland, then we can video chat.

My Craziest Out of Body Experience

It’s been a while since I’ve posted. I have been busy obsessing over out of body experiences, astral projection, lucid dreaming, and exploring consciousness. This path I’ve been which started with me understanding depression has led me way further down the rabbit hole than I ever thought. I’ve had my belief systems questioned, not to mention my own sense of self. 

So what follows is an out of body experience I had this morning that was probably my most fucked up OBE that I’ve had so far. I’ve probably had about 4 or 5 out of body experiences since my last post. 

In the middle of the night, I was lying in bed and started breathing fast and heavy and my wife started waking me up. I said, “no no it’s ok.” And shrugged her off letting her know I was trying to have an obe. (I used to let her wake me because I had night terrors before I knew what sleep paralysis is).

I didn’t have the OBE right there but then suddenly I felt like my hands and arms were numb and not part of me and I stood up on the bed and disgustedly threw them off my body onto the floor beside the bed! I looked down at my disembodied hand on the ground and it started to run away like the hand from the Addam’s family! I reached down to stop it from crawling under the bed and it felt heavy and still warm. Then I told my confused wife who was trying to sleep what just happened. But then I woke up for real and realized that was just a dream. Ah, a false awakening. But wtf, the dream seemed no different than the reality I was just experiencing!

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The Need to be Liked

Practicing mindfulness and meditation is like shining a light in the dark closet of your mind.  You find things in there that have always existed but you never paid attention to. Emotions for example. As you practice paying attention inside, you begin to realize when negative emotion stirs up and you witness it. Then you notice patterns and common themes.

One theme that I’ve noticed is worrying about what other people think. Specifically, being liked by other people.

Where does the worry come from?

As children, when we behave well we are told “you’re a good boy or girl.” When we’re bad, we’re punished and told that we are bad. This is the process of domestication where parents and teachers were preparing us to fit into society.

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My First Out of Body Experience

This morning I had what I think was my first out of body experience that I witnessed with full consciousness from start to finish. Some of you probably won’t believe me or think that I’m crazy. But I’m going to try to describe it.


Let me preface this with the fact that I have been meditating every day for about 2-3 months consistently.  I’ve been learning about spiritual enlightenment, the ego, the mind, and even the science behind what we believe to be Heaven.

While my mediation practice is about discovering my true self and detaching myself from my emotions and thoughts, I have been able to experience a few mild states of peace and bliss, sometimes accompanied by sensations of energy pulsing through my veins and a pounding heartbeat and shortness of breath. I think my desire to have an out of body experience or transcend into some spiritual existence ends up preventing me from actually experiencing it. That’s kind of the way mediation works – if you try hard or want it, it won’t come.

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